When we offend our spouse by our words, actions, or attitude; it’s common to want to take the easy way out by offering a simple, “Sorry” or “I apologize.” However, just saying these words without proper context is just as hurtful as our first offense. It’s much more effective & meaningful if we extend the “apology” by admitting our wrong, acknowledging our spouse’s hurt, intending not to do it again, and asking for forgiveness. Doing this becomes easier when we recognize we hurt our spouse, and suppress our pride to create reconciliation.
Here’s the full apology: “I’m sorry for (the offense). I know it (the effect it had on your spouse). I was wrong. I intend not to do it again. Will you forgive me?”
Example: Cetelia, I’m sorry for embarrassing you in front of our guests. I know it hurt your esteem. I was wrong. I intend not to do it again. Will you forgive me?
While these words may be difficult to utter, they can make a world of difference when offered from a sincere heart.
Read Ten Difficult, But Really Important Words for an explanation of why they’re so powerful.
Copyright © 2011 Kevin B. Bullard. All Rights Reserved. Permission granted to use and reproduce with proper source citation.
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Good Weekend Reading « The Real Life Home
June 24, 2011 at 8:31 am (UTC -4)
[...] often find it very hard to humbly apologize to my husband and children. The post, Half-Baked Apologies are Offensive at Marriage Works! was very helpful in outlining a great little formula for forming a meaningful [...]