One of the greatest things you can do for your marriage is to get a picture for your future. This picture, or vision, has amazing power to pull you forward as you go through everyday challenges. Moreover, this picture has the ability to motivate you, and keep you on the path when you’re tired, and feel you’ve had enough.
There’s a powerful quote that illustrates this idea:
If you want to build a ship, don’t drum up the men to gather wood, divide the work and give orders. Instead, teach them to yearn for the vast and endless sea.
In this quote, the idea is that the mens’ yearning for the vast and endless sea will cause them to gather wood and divide the work. Their hunger for the sea will motivate them to remain disciplined enough to build the ship that will get them to the sea
What “vast and endless sea” are you yearning for where you marriage is concerned? What are you hungry for? What pictures come to mind regarding your future? What images pull you forward? For me, it’s a picture of Ralph and LaMonica Mitchell, Fred and Pat Conner, and two rocking chairs on a porch.
The Mitchells have been married for 40 years, and the Conners for 38 years. Just seeing and being around both couples stirs me up, and pulls me forward. I want that many wonderful years with Cetelia, so I discipline myself in year 12 of my marriage to help get to year 38, 40, and beyond.
How about you? What’s pulling you forward in your marriage? What images do you see? I’d love to read your comments below.
4 comments
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Aimee Rose
June 29, 2012 at 7:54 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Me and my fiancé are marrying this October, but we have been together almost 7 years. When I imagine growing older, I picture it with him, in NH, on a porch watching our grandchildren play in the garden. The thought always makes me cry in a good way. We live in the UK but both want to emigrate to the USA. Our grandparents are our marriage role models, and I would love us to be like them at that age, still laughing and joking like teenagers.
Kevin B. Bullard
July 1, 2012 at 9:25 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Hi, Aimee – Thanks for commenting. The picture you have in mind says great, and I hope you and your fiancé make it to that porch in NH watching the grandchildren.
Lyndsey
July 10, 2012 at 9:25 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
I love this idea. Thank you so much for sharing it. Having an image of where you are going is such a powerful tool. I like how you suggest using this to symbolize the direction of your marriage. My husband, children, and I will post a picture of a vacation destination we are working towards seeing and that always keeps us excited and willing to do what it takes to get there. Applying this to our marriage would be really neat. I’d be very curious to hear what type of photo my husband would choose and why. Thanks for the conversation starter. Your website/Facebook postings are so mindful. I am grateful for the inspiration.
Kevin B. Bullard
July 11, 2012 at 9:34 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Dear Lyndsey: I like the idea of posting the vacation picture. It’s weird and neat how pictures really pull us forward. Here’s to that vacation you all will take!
Kevin