I wish she would change!
That used to be my thought pattern concerning certain things about Cetelia. After frustrating myself to no end because she wouldn’t change, I finally decided that I’d have more peace in my life (and bug Cetelia less!) if I accepted her as she is, and loved on her with all I have.
Accept: receive as adequate, valid, or suitable.
That’s what we all want. We all want our spouse to consider us adequate, valid, or suitable. We want our spouse to accept us as we are: full of potential, overcoming weaknesses, sometimes vulnerable, and at times scared to trust. In other words, we want our spouse to accept us as a human in need of tender love and care.
That’s all Cetelia wanted from me. That’s all she’s ever wanted from me. And that’s all she’ll ever want from me. If I can accept her as a human, and learn to love her as God made her, we can do anything together.
Instead of wishing your spouse would change [and becoming flustered when you don't see it happening], accept him/her. Note: Acceptance is NOT agreeing he/she is perfect, and has no room for further growth. Rather, accepting your spouse is granting him/her admission into your heart, and acknowledging that together, starting right where you both are, the two of you can do anything.